Caitlin Whyte (Host): Today's episode is about how a single moment can change everything. Ted Lemi spent decades as a leader in the audio industry and a dedicated community volunteer, but after a major health issue reshaped the course of his life, Ted found a new purpose rooted in patient advocacy, service, and gratitude.

Today, Ted serves on the boards of UPMC Lititz And the UPMC. Pinnacle Foundation volunteers extensively and speaks to ostomy support groups across the country. In this episode, Ted reflects on the medical journey that changed his outlook and shares how gratitude became a powerful force in both his healing and his commitment to giving back.

This is Ted Lemi in his own words.

Ted Leamy: So I'm a, I'm a grateful patient, but you have to know a little bit about me that, 45 years ago I had a difficulty with, an intestinal disorder and I had to have a permanent colostomy placed. I was a young man and that happened while I was living in Los Angeles.

And, I've had about a dozen surgeries subsequent to that. For various complications and things. I don't live in Los Angeles now. I live in Lititz. I came here for business reasons. And, as I've gotten older, there's some complications that occur sometimes. I'm, prone to have, bowel obstructions. small bowel obstructions.

So sometimes those small bowel obstructions reach the point where you have to go to the emergency department. Anyway, that's the context that I want to bring is that's how I came to be A-U-P-M-C patient. Being a long way away from what was my medical home base still is to a degree.

My medical home base. I presented as a patient in the emergency department, one evening. I was in a bad way. I, was able to get myself to the hospital and, I've done this quite a few times in my life. I've traveled quite a bit in my life, so I've done this in.

A number of different states and a number of different countries. I'm not bragging, it's just, what happens when you have the challenge, So I, I wasn't in a good way and everybody just did a great job at taking me in and, you know, when, patients present in the emergency department, wow.

Do doctors and clinicians, they have a tough time decoding what this situation is. Alright, that's gotta just be a crazy place to be. And, it's crazy to present in the emergency department because it's not your best day and you might not be completely clear on what is happening. And what I found that UPMC lit, its.

Is folks that were very interested in listening to me and knowing that this was a chronic challenge and right from the very start, they had so much respect for the lived experience. That's gotta be hard to do. In emergency department, when you don't know who this person is, you've never met them before.

You don't know their level of acumen when it comes to their own health literacy. And the folks at UPMC quickly, got to know who I was and what the challenge was, and quickly, took my input As the patient, as the lived experience, as I'm fond of saying, and folding that into what the next steps would be.

I was admitted to the hospital that night and I spent several days there. this particular small bowel obstruction was, passed conservatively with bed rest, a nasal gastric tube. And, NPO, no food or drink. So it passed conservatively even though there was a surgeon, nervously standing, next to me waiting to see how this next episode would unfold.

that's my story. My name is Ted Lemi and I'm fond of saying I'm a grateful patient of UPMC. I live in, Lititz, Pennsylvania. my life and career has been, as a technical person in music and entertainment, traveled around the world, since I was 18 years old. A lot of that time with the difficulty of, having a, chronic illness and having a colostomy, But there are so many wonderful places, here in the United States and around the world.

And travel is an amazing way to understand the world, understand people. I would say Spain is a favorite place of mine. Italy is a favorite place. I had a challenge in Argentina, in Mardel, Plata, Argentina. that was like that. I live on my own and I've, moved around the, the world I've lived in, New York and London and Los Angeles and San Francisco and Dallas.

And now that it's Pennsylvania. So, I have not shied away from roaming despite the medical challenge. sometimes, we remain a patient for too long, and you may know one of my, passions is to, one of the things we do so well at UPMC. Is to help patients cross the bridge, that gets them back to being a whole person.

And, that's a long, arduous bridge to cross. and sometimes you feel it's easier to just stay as a patient. And we may even know people like that in our lives and our families or friends. And they, they don't fully get back to thriving and, being who they imagine themselves to be.

I think we do that very well here at UPMC through the entire process from emergency department all the way through. I'll tell you what I don't like, I don't like the horse shit on the road on Sunday morning when you're driving a Ducati motorcycle. it's challenging. I tend to call them Amish oil slicks.

I don't know if that's, it's okay to say that on camera or not, but you can edit that out. it's very different. it's very quaint. I enjoy it quite a bit. I do spend a lot of time in Los Angeles and Dallas still. But this is my home. This is my, retirement home.

And, everybody at UPMC are my peeps. I think it's part of crossing that bridge back to being a whole person. And what you may describe is, I bet you most of us are grateful patients. Maybe some of us don't think or don't know how to necessarily express that or might not think that we.

It might be inspirational to someone else, but that's the rub because all the patients can be inspirational to others. this is the lived experience, which is very different the clinical experience or the academic experience or so many things that are involved In any hospital, in any healthcare system. the thing that I find exciting about UPMC is everyone doing their best to respect the lived experience and to, to get folks back to the lived experience.

I think we do that very well with the volunteer programs, with the Pinnacle Foundation Is key to that and how they support, different functions in the, community. I think there is a challenge of how to do it sometimes, but I think also it's timing. One of the things that I. I like to remind people is, you know, it's a little bit of a hierarchy when you first step on that bridge or when you're first in the emergency department, whatever challenge you might be facing, the goal is to become medically stable.

That is the goal. If you're not medically stable there's not much. to dream about. There's not much to go on about. I always help people understand the next step is to be functional. whatever new system that you have to cope with. Maybe it's medication, maybe it's injections, maybe it's certain therapy.

Maybe it's adapting to diet or adapting your work. That's being functional. First, we have to be medically stable. Then we have to be basically functional. Then that unlocks the door to flourish and thrive. The challenge is you can get comfortable at functional and you can say, no, I'm good.

I'm grateful. I don't need anymore. You might not need anymore, but you have the gift of life. you need to live it to what your dreams are. I think that's what the grateful patient program can do to encourage others. instead of calling us patients, I would like us all to be volunteers.

Because every one of us can volunteer inspiration to someone, to our left or to our right. just by being there. Sometimes you don't even have to say anything. Just your presence inspires someone else. Yeah. Gratitude for me, I'm gonna go back to the metaphor I always use about the bridge.

Gratitude is the hinge point You're medically stable, you are functional. gratitude threads. Its way through that. I think it's when we're functional, we're outta the woods, if you would, that we can really acknowledge being grateful. I think acknowledging, being grateful and encouraging, those that are grateful. Is the key that unlocks the door of thriving and flourishing, I would say, think through your way to contribute, we each have a different way to contribute.

some people immediately say, well, I need to make a donation. Well, it, might not be that, it might be as important to go back to the hospital that you were just at and sit with your staff for a minute. Wow. Is that meaningful? It could be, listening to someone else.

if you're outbound, maybe like me. It could be, Speaking your life philosophy to others. not that you want them to adhere to any of your thoughts, but you want them to think. So the ways to contribute are literally endless. So my error was, I wrote Deborah a letter and I thanked her and I said, what an incredible place this is.

And a few weeks later. I was a volunteer. And where was I? A volunteer UPMC, Lititz, where was I stationed in the emergency department? Everybody just said, no, you're geared for this. a few weeks or months after that, I met, one of the doctors asked me if I wanted to have lunch.

I was the chief medical officer in Lititz. I said, yeah, I'd love to. We ate lunch in the cafeteria and he asked if I would join the board of directors of the hospital. He said, we need, people like you from the private sector and help us think, things through.

So I was so, honored to do that, and a couple of months later. I met Bob Parker, and the next thing I know, Bob said, you should join the Pinnacle Foundation Board I think the word of caution is be careful when you write a thank you letter, but also the point is there's so many ways to contribute.

And you need to figure out what's comfortable for you. I think the message that, I send when I, spend time with patients in some of our support groups and sometimes with patients one-on-one. And we need to help everyone understand that they have a lot to offer By sharing their lived experience.

Not everyone is, comfortable sharing or where you are in that path from being medically stable, back to flourishing and thriving may affect how you present yourself, how you think about yourself, but. When I meet patients and sit and listen to them and then remind them how inspirational they are and they should consider maybe talking to others.

Many of them are shocked and they say, but who would listen to me? Oh my, I'm an old man. When I was a young man, I think I had that same thought. why would anybody want to know what I have to say? I think through my course of life, I understood that.

That's how we help each other, when we can communicate in whatever style that we choose, we help each other. when we check outta the hospital, I'd like to just call us all volunteers we're all just here to help each other. it's so exciting when you see a patient to say, yeah, I think I can do that.

And then it goes from that to, no, I wanna do that. And of course we have a great organization with so many ways to volunteer and so many ways to bring volunteers in to do so many different things. It's just a matter of, explaining to those folks how important they are.

it's a tough spot. you don't show up in the emergency room, on your best day. it's likely one of the worst days of your life. so it's a lot too. I think philosophically we have a challenge in healthcare about there can be a gap between our healthcare and thriving and flourishing.

let's face it, by the time we make it to the curb to be discharged, the fantastic folks that got us that far have to turn around and rush back and help someone else. So what I think we do really well at UPMC in conjunction with the Pinnacle Foundation is to create the support groups to fund the support groups.

That closes that gap. now we're caring for people for the rest of the journey. back to being a whole person. I think we do that really well. we do that really well here. I'm just one individual, person. There's so many programs, so many ways, that's done here. that's a testament to what, UPMC is the only other thing that I would say is that this is a pretty big two-way street when you volunteer.

You are giving of yourself. I'm still traveling across the bridge to be a whole person and this is part of that. So me volunteering is UPMC still caring for me.

Caitlin Whyte (Host): Ted's story is a powerful reminder that even in the most unexpected moments, purpose can emerge through his journey as a patient advocate and volunteer leader. Ted shows how gratitude can transform healing into service and experience into impact. We hope you'll like and share this episode and help other's describe these real stories told by the people who lived them.

And if listening to this episode inspires you to reflect on your own care experience. We invite you to share your gratitude for the care you, or a loved one received throughout UPMC in central PPAR. You can do so online@upmcpinnaclefoundation.org by filling out our grateful patient form with the UPMC Pinnacle Foundation.

Thank you for listening to In Their words. Until next time. Thank you for sharing in these stories